Thursday, May 14, 2009

Do you ever write STUPID things in exams?

I came across this thread in the Student Room. I was quite addicted to that website during my IG years! Ahh nostalgia. Anyway the following are actual answers by IG students, some of them unintentional and some of them just to mess with the examiners. The school always warned us not to write any personal notes in externals as they would be regarded as cheating attempts (though now I highly doubt it). I never wrote anything on purpose -though I often had the urge to write "refer to mark scheme" hahahaha. I did write some little notes on occasion, like in my synoptic bio paper. You try writing 9 consecutive pages for a bio essay without messing around. Aaaah I miss bio. Anyhoo, here they are, my top 10:

1) I forgot how to spell the word "plane" (as in aeroplane... how I forgot that I don't know) in my GCSE physics exam. This is a copy of what my answer came out as:

Give an example of where static electricity can be dangerous
When fuelling plains playens playns plaines big aluminium flying machines, a spark could result in an explosion.

2) I spelt my own name wrong on my philosophy paper!!!! :O

3) Probably have written something stupid in exams, but have definitly said something stupid, took both French and German for GCSE, had the oral exams really close together and ended my recorded German exam saying 'Au revior'! Thought it was quite funny to be honest lol!

4) In my Psychology exam I was writing about Freud's theory on the stages of development in children and I meant to say "Children go through a phase where they put toys, their hands etc in their mouths to recieve pleasure", but I actually put "Children go through a phase where they like to recieve pleasure orally" - I hope my examiner isn't dirty minded!!

5) I got really nervous in my GCSE mock french oral and so she said "tell me about your father". I ran out of things to say after a minute so she said "and what colour is his hair?", I panicked and said "green!".

6) In S1 we had to give an interpretation of the correlation, and it has to be between 1 and -1, but my answer was -21, so I wrote "The answer was -21, which is clearly wrong because it should be between 1 and -1. Therefore, I'm going to pretend my answer was -1 and my interpretation is: This shows strong negative correlation." (hahahaha!!)
Do you think that will get the mark lol?

7) I had CH4 (Chemistry) the other day and there was a question about how to safely heat some mixture over a Bunsen burner. So I said stick it in a test tube and dangle it over the flame. Only I couldn't for the life of me recall what "forceps" were called... We do all our practicals in Welsh, so I hadn't really worked out what they were called. So I wrote a whole paragraph on holding the test tube with long metal implements with a handle, and not using your bare hands, because that would burn you etc. Right at the end of the exam, I recalled a Biology lesson on pregnancy and how some babies need assistance with forceps... Eureka! So my one marker question is this massive paragraph, then at the end:

"Or you could just use forceps".


8) The worst I've ever managed is writing in my German coursework: 'In my village there is a big old cherry' instead of church (kirsche/kirche).

9) My girlfriend misunderstood the drawings on her GCSE German oral prompt card. There was a drawing of a moon and stars above a hotel (indicating to any normal person to ask about staying overnight). My girlfriend however, thought she was required to ask if there were any muslims in the doubt the examiner thought she was some form of white supremacist. (HAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! Seriously I wish I could've seen the look on the examiner's face!)

10) I do this all the time.
In my physics exam I was asked to show how you would calculate something, and I finished my answer with "et voila!" and drew a happy face.

In another physics exam, I had to draw a ray diagram, but my pencil was really blunt, so I wrote "sourry about my fat pencil" in the margin (which was supposed to be left blank).

In my chemistry exam, I did a load of working out wrong, but instead of crossing it out, I wrote "that was a waste of time...anyway..." and then continued with the question.

In my biology exam, I missed out the word sea before sea snails, when reading the question, so I went on to talk about preadation from birds, even though these snails live on the sea bed...

In a maths exam I wrote "screw it" when I couldn't work an answer out.

I often write things like "Woo!" or "Yay!" if I finally manage to crack a particularly trickey question.

Man, my examiner better have a sense of humour...

Also i remember a friend of mine wrote "jesus told me to fail" on an RE exam, spose if he had the right examiner it could have worked!


Anonymous said...

Virtual Memory sure is becoming cheaper these days. I'm curious as to when we will finally hit the ratio of 1 cent to 1 GB.

I can't wait for the day when I will finally be able to afford a 20 terabyte harddisk, hahaha. But for now I will be satisfied with having a 16 GB Micro SD Card in my R4i.

(Posted on KU2 for R4i Nintendo DS.)

Anonymous said...

Il semble que vous soyez un expert dans ce domaine, vos remarques sont tres interessantes, merci.

- Daniel